Noaka Taylor – Finally Free

Finally Free

Noaka Taylor

“I don’t want to go. I don’t want to be shunned by everyone like last time, I hate it.” Erik had said to his mother, “Nobody would like me! They all will hate me because of my sexuality!”

His mother sighed, “Take a risk love, what is the worst that can happen?” his mother had told him, with a pat on his knee, she was on her way back to finish packing. After sometime that day, everything was packed and ready to be hauled into the moving truck, all they needed to do now was to board their flight to France.

Moving from England to France was hard for Erik, he didn’t want to move, but he had too. His father got a job promotion that will make his family slightly wealthy.

A couple days later, Erik and his parents were unpacked and settled in. Erik went straight to his room and unpacked; an hour later everything was unpacked and placed neatly in its rightful place. Sighing to himself, he thought ‘Why do people hate homosexuals? It’s not my fault I’m gay.’ Shaking off his thoughts, he looked around his new room, plain white walls, a full window wall across from the door, a small closet on the near left side of the room, king sized bed laid in the middle of the floor, and the flooring was oak red wood flooring, a bookshelf placed right next to the door. The only thing so far that he liked about his new house was his room, ‘It’s my safe room’ he thought to himself.

The next day Erik had to start school, being in the middle of the semester was very bad thing for him; he was going to be labelled as the new kid.

Erik stood in front of the bathroom mirror takin gin his appearance; black soft shaggy hair, pale porcelain skin, an eyebrow piercing on his left eyebrow, pale pink plumped lips, crystal blue eyes, slightly high cheek bones, a slim face, his body built was slim, in all he didn’t like his looks, he thought that he looked ugly, just like everything else about himself.

Walking into school was nerve wrecking for Erik, ‘What if people hate me for my sexuality? What if I don’t fit in?’ He thought to himself. Feeling eyes on him, he did the right thing and kept his head faced towards the floor.

Erik wasn’t watching where he was walking and ran straight into someone,

“Hey watch it loser!” Someone yelled at Erik, looking up Erik’s eye met with a pair of hazel eyes.

“Sorry” Erik mumbled, trying to walk around the huge group of people, but with luck not on Erik’s side, a hand grabbed hold of Erik’s arm,

“Where do you think you’re going? Do you think you can just do that to me and walk away?” The man with hazel eyes said with a chuckle to Erik, Erik`s mind was going crazy with things to say, Erik opened his mouth to say something but no words came out.

“Do you even know who I am?” The man had said,

“I uh I-I’m new to this school, I am sorry, I didn’t see where I was walking, I’ll be on my way now” Erik told the unknown man, this time luck was on Erik’s side, he walked away without getting harassed.

One month passed, one agenizing month for Erik; so far he had made not a single friend.

Erik was getting bullied; he was also labelled as a freak.

Erik was right, he was going to hate it there, and nothing was looking up for Erik. The bullying was not just verbal, it was also physical, people would hit him; push him around like he was some rag doll.

7 months after Erik and his parents moved to France, he told everyone about his sexuality, about being homosexual, how he has taken an interest in men, everybody hated him after words. He thought to himself ‘I guess everyone hates me now’.

Walking into school the next day seemed like walking into the gates of hell for Erik, that place was a personal hell-hole for Erik; he preferred his bedroom, where he read books, listened to soft music for hours on end.

Two years later. After two years of putting up with the constant bullying, the madness of his thoughts, he finally snapped.

Sitting on the bed, lost in his own thoughts, Erik didn’t know what to do anymore. A voice, a voice inside Erik’s head was trying to take over his innocent mind, his mind and body was slowly slipping away from himself. Pleasant thoughts ran through Erik’s mind, he could be free forever. Standing up and walking towards the bathroom, shutting the door behind him, turning the faucet on to cold, grabbing a razor from the bathroom shelf. Getting into the tub and sitting there for what felt like eternity for Erik but it was only five minutes. Getting the razor and rolling down his sleeve where scars laid upon scars all over his left forearm, moving it across his skin, moving it more and more, until he was losing blood.

‘Just once more and I’ll be free at last’ he thought to himself, he felt weak from blood loss, but with the energy he had left, he lifted the razor again but to an artery on his forearm this time.

“Goodbye” he whispered to no one in particular, with one last cut, his whole body went numb, he couldn’t feel anything, and he smiled knowing he was going to be free, forever.

Lying in the tub, full of blood coloured water, lied Erik`s dead body. He is free, free at last. 

noaka2Noaka Taylor is a 14 year old grade 9 student at PWK High School in Ft. Smith. She enjoys all different genres but her favourite books are the Harry Potter and Twilight series. She reads all the time on her ipod at school, home and work. She enjoys writing stories based on her own life experiences.